So it has taken me three weeks to write this blog. I decided immediately what to make the topic, (“There are no wrong answers”) but every time I sat down to write, I second guessed myself. We walked on Miami Beach after checking on my deceased mother in law’s condo on January 29th with our sister-in-law Melissa (the other Mrs. Clements). It was a beautiful sunny morning and the ocean was so blue and majestic, I felt even more grateful knowing that most of the east coast was in a deep freeze and here I was walking barefoot on the beach.
We have now lived in Miami for 6 months and our relationship with Melissa and her children is beyond what I had hoped for. We made this move out of devastating sadness with the deaths of my husband’s brother and mother. But here we are 6 months later still with very heavy hearts but also an appreciation of something as simple as sunshine and time together to take a walk. I feel a closeness with Melissa to dive in and talk about the really hard things, spending time with her has become a treasured gift.
As we talked about all of the changes and the decisions we have made, we kept coming back to one clear thought – there are no wrong answers. It amazes me how comforting this thought is as I wrestle with all of the questions before us: Where should we live? What work should we do? Will it be enough to provide for our family? How can we be of service? Where should our children go to school? What activities are best for them? There are no wrong answers.
Whatever we decide to do it will all be okay, we will grow and learn and move on. There are no wrong answers. The biggest comfort in this phrase is that it is okay to make decisions, making decisions is what grown ups do. Adults make decisions. Letting the answers be what they are and knowing that regardless of what decision I make there will be space to learn and grow.
I think the reason it took me 3 weeks to write this blog is that it just seemed too simple of an idea. There are no wrong answers. This is a simple idea, but lately I have found that simple does not always mean easy. Reminding myself often that there are no wrong answers allows me the freedom to continue to make decisions, they are not always easy to make but this way I can actually make them and move on. It is a gift to be able to walk on the beach and to use that time to focus on making a decision. Walking on the beach and looking out at the ocean reminds me how big the world is. So go ahead and make some decisions today, and remember – there are no wrong answers.